Sardonic Sistah Says

Observations… Ruminations… Ponderances… & Rants from Another Perspective

The Continuous Discussion

with one comment

I remember when this movie first came out and this scene played me and my girls were nodding in the audience saying, “MMmmm-hm” and “Hell yeah!”  I had been in countless conversations similar to that.  We were young and angry.  We wanted relationships but it seemed as if black men didn’t want relationships with us.  At least not one on one. Now, taking stock on what happened to the women I used to talk to a few have found “good black men”, some have moved on to other options (men of other colors, sometimes women of the same color) and a few have become embittered. 

It’s sixteen years later and sifting through the comments of another blog what do I see?  Same discussion, almost verbatim.  But now we have the numbers to back up our anger.  All over the blogs its become a bit of a rallying cry. 70%!  70%!

But a to do what?  Date out?  Date below status?  Back in the mid 90s a friend became friends with a group of women who were advocates of “man sharing“.  The proponents said it was in our African heritage, cited the lack of “good working men” and felt that men were going to cheat anyway so you may as well just be open about it.

She then asked if me and my boyfriend at the time wanted to become a part of it.  I strongly declined.

But black women do outnumber black males.  In October 2006 the Washington Post wrote:

For every 100 single black women, there are 70 single black men, according to recent U.S. Census Bureau figures, a number that does not take into account the prison population or men living in group homes.

So then black women have to decide what they are willing to do to get the love they want and need.  Does it have to be in the visage of a black male?  Should they look for a male who makes less and/or may have less education than themselves and then what are the problems that go into that?

I understand that a woman of any color has problems on the dating scene but it does sometimes feel as if the chips are stacked unfairly against us.  Perhaps now since black women have solid proof that its not a figment of our imagination and we are at a disadvantage which is partially of our own making more of us will actually go out and search for the quality of the package instead of the color.  I hate to think in 10 years my daughter will re-enact the conversation with her homegirls.


Written by rentec

13 June, 2007 at 4:54 pm

One Response

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  1. Hi.
    Good design, who make it?


    29 November, 2007 at 9:05 am

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